Happy New Year!  Yep, 2017 has entered at full throttle, complete with hideous cold and deeply unfortunate wind.  We’ve all become complete wusses after the last few winters and as someone who has been a proud Wyoming resident for 24 years and 7 months (but who’s counting?), I don’t remember it being quite this cold for this long this early. Keep in mind that I can barely remember my kids’ names so perhaps I’m not the best weather historian.

As a rule, I avoid New Year’s resolutions like the plague.  I can’t be bothered. However, my eating habits of late have left something to be desired. I fell off the vegetable wagon in a big way in December.  As you might imagine, my children did not mourn the absence of fresh spinach but I knew it was wrong and needed to be righted.  Then there’s the fact that I consider cheese and bread to be their own specific food groups.  Not dairy and grains as food groups.  Cheese and bread specifically.  I love them to the moon and back.  Finally, there’s the ever present glass of wine.  I am a fan, what can I say?  And I blame one of my good friends for my single malt Scotch habit.  So both of those might deserve more scrutiny.  We’re not even going to bother to point out my chocolate habit.  It’s implicit.

Thus it was at a weak (and dare I say, bloated) moment that I happened upon a friend’s Facebook post about Whole30 and her pledge to begin it in 2017.  Upon further research, I learned that this is a 30-day eating program wherein one bans all sugar, grains, dairy, and (gasp!) alcohol from their diet for the entirety.  Cold turkey.

I can tell you with complete certainty that I was not drunk when I signed on for this food vacation.  Nope, it just seemed like the right message to the right person at the right time.  I want to feel better, have more energy and figure out why we buy cheese by the truckload. Plus, I have previously exhibited the willpower and restraint of my cat in a sardine plant.  Perhaps not that much, in fairness.  So this was going to be a real challenge.

Friends, many of you don’t know me personally and quite frankly, that might be safest for you for the next 24 days.  I have taken this vow of food celibacy through February 1.  I have never, ever been without those food groups in my adult life. Wait – when I was pregnant with the boys, I didn’t drink alcohol but that seemed like a noble cause at the time.  Bottom line – it ain’t gonna be pretty.

There apparently are phases during Whole30.  There’s the first few days when your body gets very angry about what you are no longer feeding it.  Then there are the next few days when you want to hurt anyone in your immediate vicinity.  I’m happy to report that as I write this, my body is angry but I am not.  Yet.  Did I mention I’m on Day 5? Yeah, it’s not going to be pretty this weekend.

The good news is that once I get through this part, it keeps getting better and better.  The food planning and prep may get old but my fridge crisper hasn’t seen this much greenery in its life.  My husband is loving that I am planning dinners for every night.  Plus, think of all the money we’ll save on wine!

I have incredible respect for anyone who has made a big resolution and is valiantly pushing through it, despite the mocking of friends and family.  Not mine, of course.  But other people’s.  Go, you!

Feel free to gingerly check in with me to see how this transformation is coming.  Helpful hint – you might want to wait another week for your own health and safety.